‘The Eclipse’: Super werewolves do not appear; eclipse sighted in name only
People were asking me how we’ve been preparing up in Cleveburg about the potential onslaught of super werewolves we might get at 3:15 or thereabouts p.m. today when the total solar eclipse happens. Mostly, the county officials have been putting up inaccurate billboards in neighboring counties trying to entice more than the 47 billion people […]
‘Mercenaries’: Lady convicts forced to free president’s kid from the country of Borat
The Asylum — close personal friends of Joe Bob and Darcy — like all studios, can be hit or miss when it comes to their output. For every lightning-in-a-bottle “mockbuster” Sharknado that folks who are not hardcore Mutants can latch on to, there’s probably about 10 or so flicks that they’re associated with that can […]
The Last Drive-In | Season 6, Week 1 — Tribute to Roger Corman “Bucket of Blood” and “Deathstalker”
Drive-in legend Roger Corman was live from the West Wind Drive-In at last year’s Jamboree.
‘The Package’: Stone Cold tries to deliver; Dolph pontificates on food
I haven’t written a review for a while. I didn’t write any snow-horror flick reviews in January. I was incommunicado during Kung Fu-bruary, even with the extra Leap Day. I watched a flick (I have witnesses), but then didn’t get around to writing a review to celebrate Henry Rollins Day. Now we’re more than half-way […]
The Last Drive-In | Joe Bob’s Very Violent Valentine
Art by T.J. Denton (@TDenton_1138 on Twitter) — visit his store! Not wanting to bury the lede, we begin with the closing credits for this epic evening of sex and violence. For what I believe is the first time, Diana Prince was listed as an “Associate Producer.” This was only appropriate as this truly was […]
Ben Nagy reviews ‘Splinter’: Weird spiky monster corners people in gas station, but it’s not made out of wood
When you start digging way deep into the ground, you never know what’s going to come up. Usually this is the case at those weird research facilities nestled back in that secluded acreage that the online overhead map view shows to be undeveloped natural land. Could be the government, the military or just your run-of-the-mill […]
The Last Drive-In | Joe Bob’s Creepy Christmas special
I think we can all agree that the first word that comes to mind when one thinks of the Mutant Family is “sophisticated,” followed soon by “urbane” and then “posh.” This explains why this year’s Last Drive-In holiday special, “Joe Bob’s Creepy Christmas,” began with a camera panning over books in a library, the music […]
Ben Nagy reviews ‘Peggy’: Long after high school, woman seeks vengeance against ex-classmates
We return from our annual foray into the woods (I got lost for a week) and check out the wild environment that is life once the 10-year high school class reunion has passed in this week’s flick, Peggy. Directed by Michigan-based filmmaker Brandon Guiles and produced by his Gallows Film Productions, it was one of […]
Ben Nagy reviews ‘Exists’: Vehicular slaughter of juvenile Sasquatch leads to poor campout experience
We can’t do a round of woods flicks without getting the tall creature with the oversized tarsals involved, so to close out this month’s reviews, we’re due for a Bigfoot flick. The number of flicks featuring Sasquatch I’ve looked at is well into the double digits, and we set forth the minimum requirements for a […]
Ben Nagy reviews ‘Animal’: Genetically mutated wildebeest/wolf/bear/boar hybrid makes people hole up in a cabin in the woods
As our annual month in the woods flicks winds down for another annum, Animal, a 2014 flick by director Brett Simmons (You Might Be the Killer), found its way onto the Screening Room’s screen and from the jump, it REALLY aspired to be a John Carpenter flick. They even used the same opening credits font […]