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The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs – “Honey the Mail Girl” Clip

Editors Note:  Readers are advised that the opinions of guest writers on this website may occasionally diverge from the infallible wisdom of Joe Bob Briggs, and in such cases, Joe Bob cannot be held responsible for any resulting confusion, enlightenment, or existential crises.  Enjoy.

Alright, folks, saddle up for a tale that’s a bit of a departure from our usual horror haunts. This time, we’re headin’ into the story of Honey, a gal with ambitions bigger than Texas itself. Honey, who started out as the “dumb bimbo blonde” on the show – their words, not mine, y’all – proved to be anything but. She was juggling roles left and right, from being a mail girl on the show to studying business administration. Yep, she graduated with a business degree from SMU and had her sights set on law school, all the while working on the show and, get this, raising a kid to boot!

But Honey wasn’t just about the books and the bills; she had dreams, folks. As a little girl, she aimed to marry Elvis – yep, the King himself. Elvis Presley was the dream, but life, as it often does, took her on a different path. After securing a full scholarship to SMU, Honey became an academic powerhouse, supporting herself and her child through her studies and her work on the show.

And then, like a plot twist in one of our beloved horror flicks, Honey up and moved to Switzerland. Was it for love? Adventure? Nope, it was for the books. She was studying for the LSAT in Paris, of all places, and got accepted into a school in London, where she earned her master’s degree in international relations.

Folks, Honey’s story is a testament to the fact that ambition knows no bounds. From aiming to be in an Elvis movie to hitting the books hard in Europe, Honey’s journey is one heck of an inspirational tale. It just goes to show, whether it’s in horror or in life, there’s always room for a twist, a turn, and a triumph.

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